Is it just me or are people getting thicker? And no I am not asking are they putting on weight, I'm asking are they becoming more and more stupid, by the day it would sometimes seem.
The reason I ask is that I have never classed myself as being particularly intelligent, I'd have said I was average at best in the brain department, but some of the people I've met of late, the younger ones in particular, make me look like bloody Einstein, so much so in fact I'm anticipating the arrival of a Nobel prize nomination any day now.
I mean when the powers that be have to put notices on cartons of eggs warning that the contents may contain egg, you do start to wonder! Are people really so stupid they can't work that out for themselves. It would seem so.
Then there's the peanut packet that states ingredients 100% peanuts and underneath that, allergy advice may contain peanuts, I mean come on! surely things like that shouldn't need stating.
Then there are the youngsters who can't do simple maths without the aid of calculators, we're not talking long division or algebra here, we're talking simple adding and subtracting.
All I can say is it's a good job we switched to metric back in 71, (you know multiples of ten). At least with that, if they find themselves in dire need they can always use their fingers and toes, assuming of course they haven't lost any in accidents.
I can see it now, young Jimmy and his best mate Steve with their first prospective employer Mr Jones. I think we'll start you off in accounts boys how is your maths? Well I can only do multiples of nine says Jimmy on account of I lost a finger when I got it stuck up my nose while I was daydreaming in class, yea says Steve, that goes for me to, only I can only do multiples of eight cause I lost a thumb as well while I was sitting there with it stuck up my arse and my brain in neutral.
What is causing such a reduction in intellect? Is it some thing in the water, is it all the micro waves flying round, if that's the case shouldn't the government be doing something to remedy the situation? Protective head gear maybe, come to think of it that's not a bad idea.
Now where's that bit of lead left over from when we had the roof done, I must make myself a hat, you know just in case.
Oh and for those who are wondering where the price of fish in the title comes in, well for those who don't know fish used to be considered brain food, may be it still is I don't know but in my case it would explain a lot, because I was never a fish lover.
Friday, 25 August 2017
Thursday, 24 August 2017
Over There
Greetings to everyone in blog land and especially to those of you deigning to read my drivel, I must start this post with an explanation of the title which probably wont mean anything to anyone under the age of 80/90 years.
The title refers to a song written in 1917 by a talented chap called George M Cohan an american as it happens, and it is about the Americans I wish to speak, or rather the Americanisms that seem to be creeping more and more into our language.
Now before we go any further let me state categorically that I have nothing against the Americans, on the contrary I love a lot of the films they make, not to mention quite a few of their tv series as well, I also quite like Harley Davidson motorcycles, so much so in fact that the only motorcycle I have ever bought brand new was an 883 sportster, incidentally it was the bike I was riding when I met my wife, it was also the bike I put the most miles on 18000 in 16 months, happy memories, no I have nothing against the yanks.
That said however I don't want them taking over our country's language and traditions which they seem to be doing more and more, I'm talking about expressions like you guys, buddy, my bad, dude, whats wrong with you chaps, pal, my mistake, mate, the expression you want some candy? Candy,Candy they're sweets for crying out loud, diapers, that's a load of crap they're called nappies.
The list is endless! you wanna catch a movie? No I want to see a film. You do the math! wheres the bloody S gone? the word's maths, its downright insidious the song said the yanks are coming, no they're not, they're already here, they're taking over, we need to do something now before its to late, I don't want a base ball cap to wear and base ball to watch, I want my old flat cap and raincoat and good old fashioned football on a Sunday afternoon.
Actually I don't want either of those things, I much prefer sky-diving and motorcycle racing, but you get the point.
Lets leave American to the Americans after all they have the accent for it, me I'd much rather have plain Olde English especially when its cider rather than apple jack.
The title refers to a song written in 1917 by a talented chap called George M Cohan an american as it happens, and it is about the Americans I wish to speak, or rather the Americanisms that seem to be creeping more and more into our language.
Now before we go any further let me state categorically that I have nothing against the Americans, on the contrary I love a lot of the films they make, not to mention quite a few of their tv series as well, I also quite like Harley Davidson motorcycles, so much so in fact that the only motorcycle I have ever bought brand new was an 883 sportster, incidentally it was the bike I was riding when I met my wife, it was also the bike I put the most miles on 18000 in 16 months, happy memories, no I have nothing against the yanks.
That said however I don't want them taking over our country's language and traditions which they seem to be doing more and more, I'm talking about expressions like you guys, buddy, my bad, dude, whats wrong with you chaps, pal, my mistake, mate, the expression you want some candy? Candy,Candy they're sweets for crying out loud, diapers, that's a load of crap they're called nappies.
The list is endless! you wanna catch a movie? No I want to see a film. You do the math! wheres the bloody S gone? the word's maths, its downright insidious the song said the yanks are coming, no they're not, they're already here, they're taking over, we need to do something now before its to late, I don't want a base ball cap to wear and base ball to watch, I want my old flat cap and raincoat and good old fashioned football on a Sunday afternoon.
Actually I don't want either of those things, I much prefer sky-diving and motorcycle racing, but you get the point.
Lets leave American to the Americans after all they have the accent for it, me I'd much rather have plain Olde English especially when its cider rather than apple jack.
Shining a light on road safety
Now like most people I'm all for being safe on the roads, after-all I do have family whom I worry about, not to mention myself, I happen to be very important to me, even if to no one else.
I'm all for things like seat belts, air bags and crumple zones in cars, especially in view of the amount of idiots that seem to inhabit our highways and byways these days.
Though I must be honest I don't like being forced to wear a seat belt by law, (I'm not a complete moron though I will concede there are a lot of them out there.) and I think as adults we should be allowed to decide for ourselves when and if we need to buckle up.
The same goes for helmets on motorcycles I have always worn a helmet and always will its stupid not to if riding any distance, but I would still like to be allowed the freedom of choice, we're talking civil liberties here! in my opinion, and thankfully I'm still entitled to that, we are far to over-governed and controlled, but that is beside the point as regards this post.
Back to the issue at hand and the point I want to raise is super-bright headlights, is it just me? or do other people think like myself, that far from being an aid to road safety these super-brights are a positive bloody menace, I can't believe that I'm the only person on the road to have been dazzled by oncoming traffic fitted with these damn things, (surely other people must have suffered from them as well?) the amount of times I have been near blinded by them is unreal, and that's just when they're dipped, if the car coming towards you, happens to have mal-adjusted headlights or god forbid is using main beam you've got no bloody chance they'll melt your bloody eye balls. And it's just as bad being hit with them from behind through your mirrors the same results apply.
Plus I firmly believe they encourage the idiots out there among us to drive faster because they can see farther ahead.
I think there's a lot of truth in risk compensation theory, you know the safer someone feels the more they throw caution to the wind, (for that read the more idiotic they behave). I'm pretty sure if every vehicle produced was fitted with a 12inch spike set to shoot up through the seat in the event of an accident people would drive a lot slower and with a lot more care, a ridiculous notion I know but a pretty safe analogy non the less, though there's probably some out there that would enjoy the idea of a 12inch spike being shot up their arse, some people after all can be very strange.
I'm all for things like seat belts, air bags and crumple zones in cars, especially in view of the amount of idiots that seem to inhabit our highways and byways these days.
Though I must be honest I don't like being forced to wear a seat belt by law, (I'm not a complete moron though I will concede there are a lot of them out there.) and I think as adults we should be allowed to decide for ourselves when and if we need to buckle up.
The same goes for helmets on motorcycles I have always worn a helmet and always will its stupid not to if riding any distance, but I would still like to be allowed the freedom of choice, we're talking civil liberties here! in my opinion, and thankfully I'm still entitled to that, we are far to over-governed and controlled, but that is beside the point as regards this post.
Back to the issue at hand and the point I want to raise is super-bright headlights, is it just me? or do other people think like myself, that far from being an aid to road safety these super-brights are a positive bloody menace, I can't believe that I'm the only person on the road to have been dazzled by oncoming traffic fitted with these damn things, (surely other people must have suffered from them as well?) the amount of times I have been near blinded by them is unreal, and that's just when they're dipped, if the car coming towards you, happens to have mal-adjusted headlights or god forbid is using main beam you've got no bloody chance they'll melt your bloody eye balls. And it's just as bad being hit with them from behind through your mirrors the same results apply.
Plus I firmly believe they encourage the idiots out there among us to drive faster because they can see farther ahead.
I think there's a lot of truth in risk compensation theory, you know the safer someone feels the more they throw caution to the wind, (for that read the more idiotic they behave). I'm pretty sure if every vehicle produced was fitted with a 12inch spike set to shoot up through the seat in the event of an accident people would drive a lot slower and with a lot more care, a ridiculous notion I know but a pretty safe analogy non the less, though there's probably some out there that would enjoy the idea of a 12inch spike being shot up their arse, some people after all can be very strange.
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